This post contains frank discussion of pornography, erotica, and trans* sexuality. Also there’s some less than “Safe For Work” language, though I’m going to * it so it doesn’t get caught by filters.
You have been warned.
The definition of trans* I’ll be working with here is anybody on the trans spectrum, including genderqueer, transgender, transexual, cross dressing, etc. People who do not necessarily or at all times identify with the gender they were assigned at birth.
A few years ago I became kind of obsessed with porn. There was nothing sexual about this, really. I was obsessed with the trans* representation in porn or, more precisely, the lack of trans* representation in porn. Porn acts almost as a distillation of society at its most basic; there’s no for nuance or dialogue or story. You have to be able to pick up everything visually, in an instant, without needing back story or to think too hard. And in mainstream porn there is very little trans* representation – and the trans representation that does exist only serves, really, to reinforce the gender binary.
Tonight a friend linked me to a tumblr that says it’s about FTM (Female to Male trans*) Porn; both actual porn and writing about porn. I clicked over and scrolled down a few posts to find this post an FTM-person had written in response to a comment that has been deleted:
I don’t want support from the community. I don’t even belong to the community. I walked out when I realized how fucking stupid it was 2 months into my transition. I don’t want or need support from people who glamorize a medical condition and run around with your t*ts flopping around, being comfortable in your body when the only symptom of transsexualism is dysphoria. When you don’t show dysphoria, it’s hard for me to believe you’re not using testosterone as a beauty product. If you like your body, why alter it?
I don’t want to see t*ts and v*ginas in the ftm tag, sorry that’s a crime.
You can all spread your legs and rub your p*ssies all you want, but if you’re showing it publicly, I will not treat you like a man.
And that, my friends, is what we call a problem.
I know that there are a lot of transexual folks who do not consider themselves part of the trans community. Once they’ve transitioned they’re done; they’re happy to finally feel whole or right or whatever term you’d like to use and they’re happy to identify as whichever gender they’ve transitioned to. That’s fine!
When people try to push that off as the only way to be a trans person? That becomes way not fine at all. The only identity you can legislate is your own identity. When you try to tell other people how to live their gender identity we end up with this gross oversimplification of gender and we end up with a lot of people who don’t or can’t fit into that binary getting shoved to the sidelines.